McDonald's Makes Everything Better, Except Mommy

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

As the mother of a three-year-old and seven-month-old twins, one of my favorite questions I get is, "How do you do it?"

My initial reply is, "I have no idea." But then I quickly remind myself that there are millions of mothers out there with more on their plates than me. I can't even begin to imagine what life is like for the Kate Gosselins or Octo-moms of the world (the normal ones, without endorsement deals and productions crews in their homes.) Then I tell people, "It's not so bad."

And it's really not...but I do fall into that grey area where my life isn't smooth sailing with one or two kids several years apart, but it's not completely unbearable with sextuplets or 18 kids. I'm not a freak show...I'm the opening act for the freak show.

For example, when I get out with my three girls by myself (something I try not to attempt too often, but sometimes we just all need to get out of the house), I can sense people looking at me in pity, or wonderment or horror that I would bring this crew out in public - alone.

The simple task of getting out of the car becomes a production when there are three of them and only one of me. Do the math; I have two hands, two car seats, one diaper bag and one very zealous toddler. It doesn't add up.

But like I said before, sometimes our day gets so hectic (like today) cooped up in the house, that the best remedy is an escape. 

It was a beautiful, warm, sunny day & I know we don't have many of those in January, so I decided to take Bianca to McDonald's to play on the purple slide. I've become somewhat of a master at getting everyone in and out of the car in one piece, but we still haven't gotten a handle (no pun intended) on going to the restroom. 

Luckily, the bathroom was empty so I assembled a holding pattern along the wall. I first got Bianca on the potty after she assessed each stall and selected the right fit. I then went to work getting one baby out of her seat and onto the changing table. About the time I got her diaper off, Bianca decided she was finished. 

"Mommy, I need help!" I hear from her stall. (Of course, she couldn't pick the stall with the changing table in it.)

"Hang on, I'm changing Brooklynn," I yell back.

Then I hear the shuffling of feet as Bianca comes waddling into my stall with the toilet paper in hand and her pants around her ankles. (Fortunately, we're still alone in the bathroom.)

I get her situated, finish the babies, get hands washed...when a woman walks in. She takes a step back as she sees my three-child circus, looks at me with sympathy and says, "I don't know how you do it?"

I just smile!